Magic Lost

I’ve found a new drug, for a while at least. Till it does its worse to me, with me, I’m trapped, blissfully.

Yes, its true that I still believe in magic, but because its betrayed me I’m not sure if its for me, or I’m for it. I want to, and yet fear shadows my heart, the scars are too livid for me to forget or to move on. Will the magic ever be the same? Even mom said it, “You’ll always keep comparing”. Stuck in that cage, is there an out from this one?

Home. I called you home. And yet, I’m not ready to go home yet. I don’t know when I will be, and what if I never want to? I want to believe, in so many things, but there is so much restlessness inside me, and I don’t know from where or from what time. To use someone’s words, I’m ‘vacillating between utopian upsurges and fatalistic submissions’.

“And I don’t, and I don’t, and I don’t, and I don’t,
No I don’t its True” @Copyright 2014, Adya Vac